Chinese New Year madness

Every year comes CNY, I have mixed feelings (except those times when I was a kid, I looked forward to celebrating CNY). I am partially excited and half dreadful of the traffic conditions to drive up north. It'll easily take 5 to 6 hours (sometimes more). I still remember there was once during my college days, I was stuck in the traffic jam for 7.5 hours, alone! I almost died of frustration. There are not many alternatives besides driving, due to the inflated flights prices and bus is not even an option with 2 young kids on tow. From past experience, if I'm to give my grandma a ring to tell her that we are not going, the conversation would sound like this:

(Translation from Hokkien dialect)

Me: Hello, Ah Mah... we might not be going to Penang this CNY. Traffic is going to be very bad la. Flight are expensive too.

Grandma: AIYO! Why didn't book flights earlier? No proper planning ar, u all? I booked 10 tables already... for CNY dinner. Now you're saying you're not coming? Haiyo... how? I have to cancel? Why you didn't plan properly? Every year also got CNY mar. Book flights few years in advance la. Cannot ar? Ang pao also packed for your kids. Now only you're telling me not coming? Drive la. Cannot drive meh? Leave early in the morning. Reach here around lunch time. Not very jam la. CNY is only once a year. How can you not be here with the family? Really not coming ar?? What did your husband says? He agrees? How now? Sure you're not coming?
(Repeat the above 3x)

Me: Ah Mah... I'm just joking la. See you on CNY.

Grandma: Oh, OK. Good, good.

Hung up the phone, grabbed my credit cards and proceed to book the overpriced flight tickets or alternatively suffer hours of standstill traffic with 2 screaming monsters in the car.

19th July 2012

...is the saddest day in my life.

He used to work long hours as lorry driver for a rubber factory. He earns few hundreds a month, supporting his 4 children to school. He had a very bad temper but he never once losses his temper on me. I remember waiting for him at the living room every evening. He would come back on his motorbike with strong odor from the rubber factory. I jumped in joy when I heard the creaking sound of the gate. Then he walked in with a small, red plastic bag with my ice cream in it. Sometimes he would buy kampung chicken eggs for me when his work took him out of town. On his day off, he would take me to kopitiam for breakfast. He would pour the coffee on the saucer for me. He said the hot coffee would cool off much faster that way. I lived with him for 17 years, until I left home for college.

He's my beloved grandfather and he passed away on 19th July at age 84. No words could describe the loss that I'm feeling.

Gong Xi, Gong Hei & Khiong Hee

Sweet and savory Yee Sang

The world's climate is changing. It was pouring cats and dogs on the first day of chinese new year. I remember the weather used to be super hot during cny when I was young. Perhaps it's the year of Water Dragon?

Life was much simpler then and cny was much livelier with grandparents and their traditions around. I remember on the 6th day of cny, my mom would buy various types of fruits as offerings for the prayer that was going to take place at the stroke of midnight on the 8th day of cny. The best part was I'm always in charge of sticking red stickers with gold trimmings on the fruits as decorations. Now that we don't live with grandparents anymore, I missed doing all that!

As for this year, reunion dinner on the eve with in-laws and reunion dinner on the first night with my own family. Dear Hubby is working on cny (you poor baby... no gambling & icy cold beer for you. lol!) but I have my two kids as compensation. A quiet first day of the Water Dragon year but it was not bad at all.

Don't give me a fish, teach me how to fish

When it comes to children, everyone (well, almost everyone) has a soft spot for their cheeky, cute looks. More even if they're our own flesh and blood. We will give them the world if we could. But is it real love by giving them everything that they want or bring them more harm by doing so?

Don't get me wrong. I do not grow up with a pair of strict parents. My parents gave me everything I need and most of the time, things I want. Things that I demanded. Barbie dolls after barbie dolls, barbie mansion with pool, bags and bags of barbie's clothes. And mind you, barbie dolls were not cheap during the 90s. I have 5 drawers full of toys, just for me. When I was 12, I paid 2 boys in school to wait for me at the front porch to carry my bag and books once I got down from the car. And when I touched 15, my dad bought me the new Motorola StarTAC mobile phone which was the 'in' thing at that time. My 16th birthday present was a Cartier watch. While my classmates were using some unknown brand bags, I had a black Prada sling bag. Even my school shoes were Fila's. That's love, defined by my parents. So what's wrong with this picture, you asked?

That was when my dad was doing well. In fact, he was doing so well that he had very little time for me. Therefore, the only way he could show his love for me was by spending money on me. When he was made redundant by the company he was working with for more than 15 years, the spending on me stops too. Of course I threw a fit for not getting what I WANT. I blamed my parents for not getting what I want and I blamed them for being poor.

Things went downhill from that day on for years. I changed to a cheaper college but it didn't get any better. Things became so bad that one of the options was for me to stop college. Lucky me, one of our relatives was kind enough to loan us my college fee while I worked 4 days in a week at a small chocolate stall to support my expenses.

Classic story of a rich brat turns poor? Just put yourself in that positon for a while. From Cartier watch and Prada sling bag to working at a small chocolate stall in a mall just to earn couple of hundreds for meals and books. Don't you feel pathetic? I did! When my friends saw me at the stall, I felt so embarassed. Embarassed for being poor. But it was a great life lesson. It taught me the value of money when I had to contemplate whether I can afford a 5-in-1 pack of Maggi mee. It taught me that there's no mercy in this cruel world. It was either I swim hard enough to grasp a breath of air or die drowning. It's just too bad I had to learn it the hard way.

If something bad happens to you or when you are no longer in this world to protect your child, do you think he or she is able to survive? And don't ever think it could never happen to you, because my dad thought the same before it happened to him.