1. "Wise men talk because they have something to say. Fools talk because they have to say something." - Plato
2. "You can't lose weight by talking about it. You have to keep your mouth shut."
3. "Some see the glass as half full. I see the glass a projectile that can be hurled at someone's face when they're annoying."
4. "Life is too precious to not seize the moment and tell the people who really deserve it to go f**k themselves."
5. "When life gives you lemons, squeeze their acidic juice into the eyes of your enemies."
6. "An ex is an ex-ample of people you shouldn't have. There is a reason why they didn't make it to your future."
7. "Some men are always casting for someone to play the Fool, make sure you're not auditioning."
8. "Just for the record, I still love you. I wouldn't bother to torture you if I didn't."
9. "Time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in your life, but your behaviour decides who will stay in your life."
10. "Woman can fake an orgasm, but men can fake the entire relationship." - Sharon Stone
11. "If you don't love me at my worst then you don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe
12. "When a woman cry, it's not over just one thing. It's built up anger and tears they've been holding in for so long."
13. "Value yourself. The only people who appreciate a doormat are people with dirty shoes."
14. "Sure, it was your idea and your fly, but he caught the big fish. Remember, fairness is a human idea largely unknown in nature."
15. "If evolution is real, why are there still monkeys? Well, education is real and there are still morons."
16. "Dear Twilight fans, vampires are dead, With no blood, it's impossible they'd get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that." Regards, Logic.
17. "Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy." - Frank Sinatra
18. "People who dress up their animals. It's not cute, it just shows you shouldn't have a pet."
19. "Your childen will become what you are; so be what you want them to be." - David Bly
20. "The older I grow, the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom." - H.L. Mencken
21. "We are not defined by the family into which we are born, but the one we choose and create. We're not born, we become." - Tori Spelling
22. "Circumstances and situations do colour life, but you have been given the mind to choose what the colour shall be." - Robert Holden
23. "My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness." - Dalai Lama XIV
24. "Depression is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign that you have been trying to be strong for too long." -Lina Teoh
25. "I'm the type who would never stab someone at the back. I prefer to stab them in the chest."